posted by limit
With the holidays and feasts coming and passing, sport climbers across the world are shitting their pants in fear over the fate of their 8a.ego score cards. Between too much booze, turkeys, pies, puddings, stuffings, and potatoes made in more ways your can imagine, even the most disciplined bolt clipper is bound to pack a few on pounds–obviously a bad thing for both your projects and your ego.
But never fear, Limit is to the rescue! I’m going to share with you a magical diet I picked up a few years ago while living in Hollywood working as a stunt double and fitness trainer for stars so big you’ve never heard of them. Despite what nutritionists may tell you, this IS a magic bullet to weight gain. You CAN eat whatever you want and as MUCH as you want. There are no mandatory foods and no forbidden foods. Life IS easy.
Here’s how it works. When you’re done gorging yourself with sugary, fatty holiday delights, find a bathroom (a secluded alley works as well), stick your finger or a toothbrush down your throat and UPCHUCK THAT SHIT. If you can’t get past the gag reflex check out Ipecac, available from Amazon. It’s as simple as that kids.
Many will call The Limit Diet “unsafe” or “controversial.” Personally I don’t give a shit because it works.
With the right drugs, enough self discipline and a little encouragement from your friends, you too can both enjoy the holidays AND keep your perfect sport climbing body. If you’re lucky, you might even end up looking like the chick to the right.
Binge and Purge bitches!